We help protect the rights of thousands of Estonian children and their parents!

On the People’s Initiative page, a petition has recently been put up to finally bring the issue of child transfer to the National Assembly.

https://rahvaalgatus.ee/initiatives/1208-kaitseme-lapse-%C3%B5igust-m%C3%B5lemale-vanemale.

While in many developed countries, the alienation of a child is defined in legislation, Estonia is several steps behind in this regard, and our courts and child protection bodies are left without the necessary tools.

There are also parents and children on this subreddit who have experienced alienation by the other parent. There are situations where, in terms of the child’s well-being, it is indeed better if he lives and communicates with only one parent, but in the case of alienation, the child is in a situation where he is completely under the influence and control of the parent who manipulates him.

In the case of child alienation, one of the parents tries to take revenge on the other parent after the separation by manipulating the common child. For the alienating parent, the welfare of the child is not the first priority. Examples of his methods include:

• smearing the other parent, generating and spreading lies about him,

• buying off the child with things, trips and so on,

• economic ruin of the other parent to prevent his ability to go to court,

• limiting the child’s contacts with all people related to the other parent,

• constant monitoring of what the child says with the other parent in messages or calls,

• limiting the child’s mental health care to prevent the specialist from getting an idea of ​​what is going on.

NB! Child adoption is gender neutral! The alienator is usually a person with narcissistic traits who is driven by revenge for abandonment. The alienator’s gender is not decisive here. However, the transferor is mentally or physically violent, which is why the probability of the effectiveness of the family reconciliation service is close to zero.

In the case of alienation, the first and perhaps the most important sign is that a child who previously had a close relationship with his parent turns away from that parent practically on the first day, and he cannot give a reason for this.

Alienation results in the child’s mental health problems – depression, developing personality disorder, withdrawal by telling everyone that everything is fine, constant fear of a parent who manipulates him. The estranged parent lives in unending grief. The child is lost to him. He knows that the child is in trouble, but he cannot reach the child to help him. In more extreme cases, the alienating parent kidnaps the child and takes him to live in a foreign country. Depression is almost always present among alienated parents and they are at increased risk of suicide.

Since there is no concept of alienation of a child in the legislation, child protection workers and courts in Estonia do not use appropriate methods created on a scientific basis, which have become the norm in many other countries. Many alienated children and parents also do not know that what has been done to them has a name. The aim of this popular initiative is to change that.

If the topic speaks a little, please give your signature!

If you yourself are faced with the alienation of a child, you can feel free to write privately and I will connect you with people from whom you can find support and advice!

Thank you!